As I write this post, I am 33 years old, soon to be 34....... the last 2 years, I have begun a more proactive approach in finding answers to what is causing these terrible migraines.
Let me first start out by saying I have a lot to be grateful for. That however, is another post. I don't want anyone to think for a minute that I am being 'Debbie Downer'. I am merely using this blog to share my story in hopes that other people can help me, or the millions like me, to find answers.
The theory that my migraines were related to my period was starting to fall away as my migraines were becoming more frequent, and more intense. My doctor tried several different types of birth control and nothing was working. The depo provera shot was the worse decision I made. I had daily, intense, painful migraines for the ENTIRE 7 months that that shot was in my system. I will never do that again! I decided I now needed to accept the migraines as they came, so I just continued to take a oral birth control.
Life seemed to be more in balance. I was dating a great guy, I had my own business, I owned my own place, drove a nice car, had great friends, etc..... financially things could've been better but the economy was about to dive and I knew that would be an issue no matter what.
Here is where things get interesting: I decided that I would do whatever it took to get tests done or try anything anyone recommended just to say "been there, done that". I went to see a neurologist who recommended I get tested to see if I had PFO (a hold in the heart which many migraine sufferers have). I did that test and they said I had a minor, minor hole but that it wasn't sufficient enough to warrant concern. Next test was an MRI, they said they didn't see anything of concern there either. Next test was a sleeping test. They wanted to see if I was getting enough oxygen to my brain while I slept. Results were normal.
In the mean time I was getting acupuncture treatments which didn't seem to be working either. I spent I don't know how much money on these tests and treatments and nothing was making a difference and according to the doctors I was "healthy". I spend hundreds of dollars on vitamins and other natural remedy's to no avail. I would feel better after a 90 minute deep tissue massage but don't we all? And that is expensive to keep up.
Over the years I have tried every preventative medication on the market as well as relief medication such as Frova, Imitrex and maxalt. Maxalt helps sometimes, but sometimes I don't feel the effect until 6 hours after I've taken it and by that time it's 8:00 at night. I've tried oils as well.
Bottom line: I've tried almost everything in the book and now I am getting migraines about 6 days a week. I have charted my migraines over the past 10 months and will put that in a post too.
HELP!!!!
Wednesday, October 31, 2012
The 20's
No I'm not talking 1920's, I'm talking my 20 something years.....This I can remember a little more clearly (you would hope right?)........ I noticed when I was in my early to mid 20's that I was getting migraines during my menstrual cycle and once my cycle was over, the migraines would end. I felt like I had to accept that for a week out of every month, I would not only have to deal with the other flattering things that came with a period, but also migraines. I took it upon myself to mark my calendar and prepare for that god-forsaken week of hell every month. That would mean I may not be able to be 100% at work, or that may mean I would warn my then-husband that I may be a bitch for a week, or it may mean my friends would have to deal with me being a flake and possibly cancel any plans we had last minute.
So it would go, 3 weeks feeling pretty good, one week feeling miserable. That went on for several years until my doctor said "why don't we try putting you on a new form of birth control that makes it so you don't have a period?" "Sounds great" I said............. Well my body rejected that and no matter what I did, my period still came as well as the dreaded migraines.
In 2006 I got a divorce and of course through the tears came a pounding in my head and even though I didn't let the tears stop, I learned my lesson quickly that if I cried my eyes out, I created migraines. Being a naturally emotional person, I tried to be strong when possible but let the tears flow when needed. If they caused a migraine, so be it, I needed to cry.
I began to wonder if the stress of the divorce and starting a new life on my own was causing more migraines so I took initiative to get sleeping pills and any anxiety medication I may need to decrease the stress in my life and get the sleep I needed to. Turns out (as you will read in my 30's post), no amount of decreasing stress in my life was helping the pattern.
In a nutshell, my 20's were a time of learning, growing, playing, dating, grieving a failed marriage, meeting new friends, starting a new business, traveling all over the world, laughing a lot, crying a lot, buying my new home, getting the car of my dreams, building wonderful relationships with family, being independent, etc..... the real journey of finding answers to my migraines started in my 30's..........
So it would go, 3 weeks feeling pretty good, one week feeling miserable. That went on for several years until my doctor said "why don't we try putting you on a new form of birth control that makes it so you don't have a period?" "Sounds great" I said............. Well my body rejected that and no matter what I did, my period still came as well as the dreaded migraines.
In 2006 I got a divorce and of course through the tears came a pounding in my head and even though I didn't let the tears stop, I learned my lesson quickly that if I cried my eyes out, I created migraines. Being a naturally emotional person, I tried to be strong when possible but let the tears flow when needed. If they caused a migraine, so be it, I needed to cry.
I began to wonder if the stress of the divorce and starting a new life on my own was causing more migraines so I took initiative to get sleeping pills and any anxiety medication I may need to decrease the stress in my life and get the sleep I needed to. Turns out (as you will read in my 30's post), no amount of decreasing stress in my life was helping the pattern.
In a nutshell, my 20's were a time of learning, growing, playing, dating, grieving a failed marriage, meeting new friends, starting a new business, traveling all over the world, laughing a lot, crying a lot, buying my new home, getting the car of my dreams, building wonderful relationships with family, being independent, etc..... the real journey of finding answers to my migraines started in my 30's..........
The Early Years
I would like to say I am one of those people who keeps diaries, but unfortunately back in the day, I guess I was too lazy to write, and my memory has failed me considerably (I'm only 33 so that isn't a good sign of things to come). I am trying to take a trip down memory lane to when I first became aware of migraines.
I remember getting headaches, and maybe they would be classified as migraines, but compared to what they are now, I'm not sure I suffered from as many migraines as I did headaches when I was a teenager. I spoke to my high school boyfriend a few months ago and he said "I'm sorry you're still having migraines, I remember how bad they were and wish there was something I could have done for you, but you always wanted to be alone in a dark room". I was surprised by this as I don't remember 18 years ago with how I dealt with migraines. If any young people are reading this, I encourage you to document your life. When you're older, you will thank me! I wish I could go back and remember more. Now let's move to my 20's.....
I remember getting headaches, and maybe they would be classified as migraines, but compared to what they are now, I'm not sure I suffered from as many migraines as I did headaches when I was a teenager. I spoke to my high school boyfriend a few months ago and he said "I'm sorry you're still having migraines, I remember how bad they were and wish there was something I could have done for you, but you always wanted to be alone in a dark room". I was surprised by this as I don't remember 18 years ago with how I dealt with migraines. If any young people are reading this, I encourage you to document your life. When you're older, you will thank me! I wish I could go back and remember more. Now let's move to my 20's.....
Tuesday, October 30, 2012
As they say "My life in a nutshell", I like to say "My life in a migraine"
Tuesday October 30, 2012
After nearly 18 years of migraines, I have finally decided to start a blog sharing my story for a few reasons:
* I know that unless you've really experienced a true migraine, it's hard to empathize with those of us who do.
* I know that if you live with somebody who has never had a migraine before, you feel somewhat alone.
* I know how hard it is to get up and go to work everyday when you're in pain.
* I know that the days I feel "normal" I feel like I can do anything.
* I know that on the days I struggle in pain, I feel like crawling in a dark hole and never coming out.
* I know how frustrating it can be to see doctor after doctor, neurologist after neurologist, doing test after test only to have them say "we don't see anything" yet wanting to scream because you know how you feel every day.
* I know how it feels to break down in front of loved ones and even doctors over the anguish you feel.
* I know how it feels to have people expect things from you when YOU know it was a feat to even put on mascara that day.
* I know how it feels to try every medication on the market only to be let down day in and day out when it doesn't work.
* I know how it feels to change your diet (maybe they are due to food allergies) do cleanses (maybe I have a build up of toxins and that is creating migraines), change mattresses and pillows (maybe the way I sleep is causing them), wear mouth guards (maybe I'm clenching my jaw), change birth control countless times (maybe they are hormonal), skip periods (at first they came on only during my cycle so I would skip my placebo week hoping that would do the trick), meditate (maybe it's because I'm stressed), acupuncture, homeopathy, botox, massages, yoga, exercise, on and on and on only to have exhausted those attempts.
* I know how you start to feel like you're a burden to those around you when you complain everyday but if you don't vent, you feel alone.
* I know how hard it is to try to be social when all you want to do is be alone with ice packs surrounding your head
* I know how hard it is to drive when you're having aura symptoms but you have to work right?
* I know how it feels to say you just want someone to get a drill and drill your skull so you can have less pressure.
* I know how it feels to ask someone to get a bat and hit you upside the head......just once
* I know how it feels to be afraid to have children because you are afraid you won't be a good mother
* I know how it feels to have your spouse do simple daily routines like heat up something in the microwave, or chop vegetables and you want to run into another room and cover your ears because it feels like somebody is taking a drum and beating it next to your head
* I know how it feels to enjoy the smells of your favorite foods on "normal" days but feel like throwing up on migraine days
* I know how it feels to want to turn off any light and want to yell at someone when they accidentally turn on a light in the room you're in
I KNOW.............
After nearly 18 years of migraines, I have finally decided to start a blog sharing my story for a few reasons:
* I know that unless you've really experienced a true migraine, it's hard to empathize with those of us who do.
* I know that if you live with somebody who has never had a migraine before, you feel somewhat alone.
* I know how hard it is to get up and go to work everyday when you're in pain.
* I know that the days I feel "normal" I feel like I can do anything.
* I know that on the days I struggle in pain, I feel like crawling in a dark hole and never coming out.
* I know how frustrating it can be to see doctor after doctor, neurologist after neurologist, doing test after test only to have them say "we don't see anything" yet wanting to scream because you know how you feel every day.
* I know how it feels to break down in front of loved ones and even doctors over the anguish you feel.
* I know how it feels to have people expect things from you when YOU know it was a feat to even put on mascara that day.
* I know how it feels to try every medication on the market only to be let down day in and day out when it doesn't work.
* I know how it feels to change your diet (maybe they are due to food allergies) do cleanses (maybe I have a build up of toxins and that is creating migraines), change mattresses and pillows (maybe the way I sleep is causing them), wear mouth guards (maybe I'm clenching my jaw), change birth control countless times (maybe they are hormonal), skip periods (at first they came on only during my cycle so I would skip my placebo week hoping that would do the trick), meditate (maybe it's because I'm stressed), acupuncture, homeopathy, botox, massages, yoga, exercise, on and on and on only to have exhausted those attempts.
* I know how you start to feel like you're a burden to those around you when you complain everyday but if you don't vent, you feel alone.
* I know how hard it is to try to be social when all you want to do is be alone with ice packs surrounding your head
* I know how hard it is to drive when you're having aura symptoms but you have to work right?
* I know how it feels to say you just want someone to get a drill and drill your skull so you can have less pressure.
* I know how it feels to ask someone to get a bat and hit you upside the head......just once
* I know how it feels to be afraid to have children because you are afraid you won't be a good mother
* I know how it feels to have your spouse do simple daily routines like heat up something in the microwave, or chop vegetables and you want to run into another room and cover your ears because it feels like somebody is taking a drum and beating it next to your head
* I know how it feels to enjoy the smells of your favorite foods on "normal" days but feel like throwing up on migraine days
* I know how it feels to want to turn off any light and want to yell at someone when they accidentally turn on a light in the room you're in
I KNOW.............
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)