Normally, I'm not one to post the typical "cheesy" stories around the holidays, but I have felt for a couple of weeks now, to pay gratitude to those who have helped me so much through this journey. Today, I have felt pretty good and it turned into feeling even better as the night went on, so I felt it was a good time to reflect, it also happens to be Thanksgiving next week so here it goes:
First and foremost, I must thank the two most important people in my life. My mother and my husband. Some would say "where is God?" Even though I am spiritual in my own way, and was brought up in the Mormon religion, I have not practiced for over a decade. I am happy with where my life is, and I don't feel I'm missing a thing, so, that's why my mom and husband take the top spots! Let me get a few other people in the spotlight first:
To my family, immediate, extended and in-laws: Thank you for all the text messages, research, prayers, words of encouragement, hugs, and LOVE you've given me throughout this journey. I know you are all busy doing your own things, raising your own families, worrying about your own lives, but somehow you manage to take time to help me in my quest to find answers. At times, I never feel as though I do enough for you or your kids. I understand now when my friend wrote a blog and titled it the way she did because migraines have taken a toll on her life, and all she wants to do is to be able to 'run with my kids'. I get that now, and I don't even have kids! I feel as though, I would not be the mom I want to be if I had kids and the amount of migraines I have. I admire this woman so much! Anyways, so to all of you THANK YOU FOR BEING YOU!
My darling grandpa passed away a few months ago and since the day he died, I have seen the sequence of the number 1 almost everyday. I can only think of one day that I haven't seen any 1's. It can come in the way of looking up on TV and seeing the last digits of a phone number being 1111, it can be checking my email one day and seeing that I have 111 email. It can be me scoring a 111 in a game on my phone or seeing 11:11 on the clock (that is the most frequent). I know Papa is telling me HI every time I see that and he truly is my ANGEL. My sweet, sweet grandma has been helpful in every way offering me words of encouragement and always making me feel justified in the pain I feel daily.
I can hear the anguish in my dad's voice when he calls to ask how I have been, and I can't give him good news. I can't begin to imagine the pain it must be for a parent to watch their child struggle. Again, probably another reason I haven't had kids. I wouldn't wish this on my worst enemy (not that I have any that I know of haha).
To my friends: WAY too many to list but you know who you are. The friends closest to me whom I talk to on a daily, weekly basis, have heard the complain of the infamous MOLY THE MIGRAINE! Yes, I named her and have called her many names! I had to try to make a joke out of it somehow and make comments like 'Moly is sleeping over', or 'Moly packed her bag and came on vacation with me' etc. My friends are my life and I don't know what I would do without them. They also send love and do everything in their power to let me know they are thinking of me and I appreciate each one of you! Also to my Doctor and his staff. I have never had a woman work so hard to help me than my Doctor's receptionist. She goes above and beyond to help me either get a prescription I need, get in to see my doctor, or call me after hours to tell me something that the doctor said. I know someday she will move on and do amazing things, but she is the kind of person I don't want to ever leave this position. So to my friends, I love all of you! Those I have known my whole life, those who I've known 15 years and those whom I just met! You all help make life worth living!
In my line of work, my clients become my family and I have shared my struggles with most of them. I feel that they open their hearts to me, so I can do the same. I feel as though I am there to help them, and in return, if they can give me some suggestions, they have helped me. Thank you to all of you and you know who you are as well <3
Thank you to everyone who follows my blog and who reads it. Thank you to the countless people I know on face book who have inboxed me or shared their stories of 'survival' with migraines. You know the saying "It takes a village to raise a child?" Well it's taken a whole community of family, friends and strangers to help this child! Thank you to each of you!
To my husband: Here is when the tears start! I LOVE YOU SO MUCH! We have been through hell and back and you have been nothing short of amazing! I remember the years you spent in pain with your back and how I didn't think twice about taking care of you, or doing the best I could to support you in your quest to live with pain. I remember thinking "how does he do it?" Now, you're taking over and I'm sure you think the same thing, but I feel so bad you have to see me go through this. When we said our vow of "in sickness and in health", I now know what that is entailing. I'm sure we will go through so much more but you have shown the definition of unconditional love. You work hard, you come home tired, yet still cook and clean up. You give me massages a lot and hug me a lot. You never make me feel bad when I have days that I can't work as hard as I might've the week before. You never "worry". You always have a positive attitude! You have stepped up in a way I will never be able to thank you enough for. And that, is why I married you! 143 xoxo
To my mommy! My BFF! Again, tears! I truly, truly don't know what I would do without you in my life. I still believe that I picked you to be my mom! Talk about unconditional love as well, you are the definition! You love me, you support me, you let me vent, you buy me little treats and surprises to make me smile. You let me complain every day morning and night. You never judge, you always sacrifice whatever you're doing to take care of me. I'm so lucky to be your daughter. I have never felt closer to you than I do as an adult and even though I'm only getting older, I always feel like I can climb in your lap and snuggle and be 'your little girl'. I never want to see you get old, because I couldn't take it, so if you could, please stay your youthful self :) Only you know the things you do for me on a daily basis. I'm sure it gets old waking up to a long text from me complaining of the pain but you always ask what you can do, and tell me you love me and that's all I need. You can't fix my migraines, but you certainly help it. As a migraine sufferer, I know you know the pain. I know I don't say it often enough but I appreciate everything you do for me!
I wanted to make my blogs short and to the point but this blog could go on and on and on, so I will sign off, but I don't want to leave anyone out so if you feel you've helped me in some way, I'm sure you have and I'm sure I've thanked you along the way. I hope everyone has a safe and wonderful Thanksgiving and as much as I complain about these migraines, I truly am grateful for life! <3
Friday, November 16, 2012
Thursday, November 1, 2012
The year of the MIGRAINE 2012
I decided to chart not only eating habits but how much sleep I got, how my mood was, or any other factors in a day that I felt I could chart that may help me find a pattern. Needless to say, I can't find a pattern and rather than bore you with those minuscule details, I thought it would be interesting for some people to visually see what my daily life has been like since January. I also tracked how intense the migraines were but for the sake of not making this post too long, I'll just list the days I had a migraine and the days I was "normal". I also listed if I was in town (which will just be blank and not state a city) or out of town because it shows it's not privy to being in Utah which some people think I get them because of air quality. If I had a migraine that day it will have a M next to the day, if I felt normal there will be a smiley face: IF ANYONE SEES A PATTERN, LEAVE A COMMENT, THANKS!!
| 1-Jan | :) San Francisco | 1-Feb | M San Francisco | 1-Mar | :) Detroit | ||
| 2-Jan | M | 2-Feb | :) San Francisco | 2-Mar | :) | ||
| 3-Jan | :) | 3-Feb | M San Francisco | 3-Mar | :) | ||
| 4-Jan | :) | 4-Feb | :) | 4-Mar | :) | ||
| 5-Jan | :) | 5-Feb | :) | 5-Mar | :) | ||
| 6-Jan | :) | 6-Feb | :) | 6-Mar | M | ||
| 7-Jan | :) Wyoming | 7-Feb | M | 7-Mar | :) | ||
| 8-Jan | M | 8-Feb | M | 8-Mar | :) | ||
| 9-Jan | M | 9-Feb | M | 9-Mar | :) | ||
| 10-Jan | :) | 10-Feb | M | 10-Mar | :) | ||
| 11-Jan | M | 11-Feb | M | 11-Mar | :) Philadelphia | ||
| 12-Jan | M | 12-Feb | M | 12-Mar | :) Philadelphia | ||
| 13-Jan | M | 13-Feb | M Kansas City | 13-Mar | :) Philadelphia | ||
| 14-Jan | M | 14-Feb | M Kansas City | 14-Mar | :) Philadelphia | ||
| 15-Jan | M | 15-Feb | M Kansas City | 15-Mar | :) Philadelphia | ||
| 16-Jan | M Los Angeles | 16-Feb | M Kansas City | 16-Mar | :) | ||
| 17-Jan | :) Los Angeles | 17-Feb | M Kansas City | 17-Mar | :) | ||
| 18-Jan | :) Los Angeles | 18-Feb | :) | 18-Mar | :) | ||
| 19-Jan | :) Los Angeles | 19-Feb | :) | 19-Mar | :) | ||
| 20-Jan | M Los Angeles | 20-Feb | :) | 20-Mar | M | ||
| 21-Jan | M Los Angeles | 21-Feb | :) | 21-Mar | :) | ||
| 22-Jan | :) Los Angeles | 22-Feb | :) | 22-Mar | :) | ||
| 23-Jan | :) | 23-Feb | :) | 23-Mar | :) | ||
| 24-Jan | :) | 24-Feb | :) | 24-Mar | M | ||
| 25-Jan | :) | 25-Feb | :) | 25-Mar | :) Boston | ||
| 26-Jan | M | 26-Feb | :) | 26-Mar | :) Boston | ||
| 27-Jan | M | 27-Feb | :) Detroit | 27-Mar | :) Boston | ||
| 28-Jan | :) | 28-Feb | :) Detroit | 28-Mar | :) Boston | ||
| 29-Jan | :) | 29-Feb | :) Detroit | 29-Mar | M Boston | ||
| 30-Jan | M San Francisco | 30-Mar | :) Boston | ||||
| 31-Jan | M San Francisco | 31-Mar | :) Boston | ||||
| 1-Apr | :) | 1-May | :) | 1-Jun | :) Jackson Hole | ||
| 2-Apr | :) | 2-May | M | 2-Jun | :) Jackson Hole | ||
| 3-Apr | :) | 3-May | :) | 3-Jun | :) | ||
| 4-Apr | :) | 4-May | M | 4-Jun | :) | ||
| 5-Apr | :) | 5-May | M | 5-Jun | :) Island Park | ||
| 6-Apr | :) | 6-May | M | 6-Jun | :) Island Park | ||
| 7-Apr | :) | 7-May | M | 7-Jun | :) Island Park | ||
| 8-Apr | M | 8-May | M | 8-Jun | :) | ||
| 9-Apr | M | 9-May | M | 9-Jun | :) | ||
| 10-Apr | :) | 10-May | M | 10-Jun | :) | ||
| 11-Apr | :) | 11-May | M | 11-Jun | :) | ||
| 12-Apr | :) | 12-May | M | 12-Jun | :) | ||
| 13-Apr | :) | 13-May | :) Boston | 13-Jun | :) | ||
| 14-Apr | :) | 14-May | M Boston | 14-Jun | :) | ||
| 15-Apr | :) | 15-May | :) Boston | 15-Jun | :) | ||
| 16-Apr | :) | 16-May | :) Boston | 16-Jun | :) | ||
| 17-Apr | :) | 17-May | M Boston | 17-Jun | :) | ||
| 18-Apr | :) | 18-May | :) Boston | 18-Jun | :) | ||
| 19-Apr | :) | 19-May | :) | 19-Jun | :) | ||
| 20-Apr | M | 20-May | :) | 20-Jun | :) | ||
| 21-Apr | M | 21-May | M | 21-Jun | :) | ||
| 22-Apr | :) | 22-May | :) | 22-Jun | :) | ||
| 23-Apr | M Las Vegas | 23-May | :) | 23-Jun | :) | ||
| 24-Apr | :) Las Vegas | 24-May | :) | 24-Jun | :) | ||
| 25-Apr | M Las Vegas | 25-May | :) | 25-Jun | :) | ||
| 26-Apr | M Las Vegas | 26-May | :) | 26-Jun | M | ||
| 27-Apr | :) St. George | 27-May | :) | 27-Jun | :) | ||
| 28-Apr | M St. George | 28-May | :) | 28-Jun | :) | ||
| 29-Apr | M St. George | 29-May | :) | 29-Jun | :) | ||
| 30-Apr | M | 30-May | :) | 30-Jun | M | ||
| 31-May | :) Jackson Hole | ||||||
| 1-Jul | M | 1-Aug | :) | 1-Sep | M | ||
| 2-Jul | :) | 2-Aug | M | 2-Sep | M | ||
| 3-Jul | :) | 3-Aug | :) | 3-Sep | :) | ||
| 4-Jul | :) Island Park | 4-Aug | :) | 4-Sep | M | ||
| 5-Jul | :) Island Park | 5-Aug | :) | 5-Sep | M | ||
| 6-Jul | :) Island Park | 6-Aug | M | 6-Sep | M | ||
| 7-Jul | :) Island Park | 7-Aug | M | 7-Sep | :) | ||
| 8-Jul | :) | 8-Aug | M | 8-Sep | M | ||
| 9-Jul | M | 9-Aug | M | 9-Sep | :) | ||
| 10-Jul | M | 10-Aug | :) | 10-Sep | :) | ||
| 11-Jul | :) | 11-Aug | :) | 11-Sep | :) | ||
| 12-Jul | M | 12-Aug | :) | 12-Sep | :) | ||
| 13-Jul | :) | 13-Aug | M | 13-Sep | :) | ||
| 14-Jul | :) | 14-Aug | :) | 14-Sep | M | ||
| 15-Jul | :) | 15-Aug | :) | 15-Sep | M | ||
| 16-Jul | M | 16-Aug | :) | 16-Sep | :) | ||
| 17-Jul | M | 17-Aug | M | 17-Sep | :) New York | ||
| 18-Jul | M | 18-Aug | M | 18-Sep | :) New York | ||
| 19-Jul | :) | 19-Aug | M | 19-Sep | :) New York | ||
| 20-Jul | :) | 20-Aug | M | 20-Sep | :) New York | ||
| 21-Jul | :) | 21-Aug | M | 21-Sep | M New York | ||
| 22-Jul | :) | 22-Aug | M | 22-Sep | :) | ||
| 23-Jul | :) Chicago | 23-Aug | M | 23-Sep | :) | ||
| 24-Jul | :) Chicago | 24-Aug | M | 24-Sep | M | ||
| 25-Jul | :) Chicago | 25-Aug | M | 25-Sep | M | ||
| 26-Jul | :) Chicago | 26-Aug | M | 26-Sep | M | ||
| 27-Jul | :) Chicago | 27-Aug | M | 27-Sep | M | ||
| 28-Jul | :) Chicago | 28-Aug | M | 28-Sep | :) | ||
| 29-Jul | :) Chicago | 29-Aug | M | 29-Sep | :) | ||
| 30-Jul | :) | 30-Aug | M | 30-Sep | :) | ||
| 31-Jul | :) | 31-Aug | M | ||||
| 1-Oct | :) 1-Nov M | ||||||
| 2-Oct | :) 2-Nov M | ||||||
| 3-Oct | :) 3-Nov :) | ||||||
| 4-Oct | M 4-Nov :) | ||||||
| 5-Oct | :) 5-Nov M | ||||||
| 6-Oct | :) 6-Nov M | ||||||
| 7-Oct | :) 7-Nov M | ||||||
| 8-Oct | M 8-Nov :) | ||||||
| 9-Oct | :) 9-Nov M | ||||||
| 10-Oct | :) 10-Nov :) | ||||||
| 11-Oct | M 11-Nov M | ||||||
| 12-Oct | M 12-Nov M | ||||||
| 13-Oct | M 13-Nov M | ||||||
| 14-Oct | M 14-Nov M | ||||||
| 15-Oct | M 15-Nov M | ||||||
| 16-Oct | M 16-Nov M | ||||||
| 17-Oct | M 17-Nov :) | ||||||
| 18-Oct | M 18-Nov :) | ||||||
| 19-Oct | M 19-Nov :) | ||||||
| 20-Oct | M 20-Nov :) | ||||||
| 21-Oct | M 21-Nov :) | ||||||
| 22-Oct | M 22-Nov :) | ||||||
| 23-Oct | :) 23-Nov :) | ||||||
| 24-Oct | M 24-Nov M | ||||||
| 25-Oct | M 25-Nov M | ||||||
| 26-Oct | M 26-Nov M | ||||||
| 27-Oct | :) Arizona | ||||||
| 28-Oct | M Arizona | ||||||
| 29-Oct | M | ||||||
| 30-Oct | M | ||||||
| 31-Oct | M | ||||||
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